Predicatably, it was an exhuasting week at work! Having an amazing amount of time should have left me well rested and in some respects ready for the onslaught awaiting me. In other respects I was almost at a disadvantage by being rested. My rhythms were not the frenetic pace that my work days typically are and I felt like a record that should be 33 rpm (dating myself here as this is the CD age) being played at 45 rpm. By weeks end, I was more my "work self" sufficiently over caffienated that I was multitasking and getting boatloads of stuff done. But I miss the quieter rhythms. Thus, thank goddess for Fridays! Today at 4 I could breathe deeply, let go of the work pace a bit and re-group.
I braved the ice and took the dog for a walk. We admired the moon, riding high and nearly full in the cloudless sky. How it can be cloudless when yet more snow is supposed to be on its way, but for now, cloudless it is. I came home and tidied the kitchen and played with the kids and then took each of them out to see the moon once it was really darker out. KC is my true moon child. Kissed by the light of the full moon only weeks after his birth he has always gravitated toward the peaceful light of luna. Lissa is a sun child, of active sparkling energy but tonight she too was a bit awed by the beauty that is moon light in winter. "Oooooh cool!" she whispered, and as she was warmly wrapped, I know it was a comment on the sight and not the temperature.
Such moments are true blessings, memories I hold close to me when times are trying.
Friday, January 9, 2009
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Calm before the storm
No emotional storms, we are expecting more winter weather. Not just snow, but more ice. Weird this icy phenomenon we are experiencing. If it was March I would sort of understand it. But it is uncommon in December and January in the Northeast. And most unwelcome. I imagine my eldest--the family environmental watchdog will scream that it is global warming. He could be right. Or it could be a weird weather pattern that will not be seen again for many years. At any rate, tonite the weather was still nice. Crisp and still. The sidewalks are finally safe to walk on at night again. The dog and I used to walk regularly after supper. Just 30 to 40 minutes. He is overweight and I thought it would be good for him. I know it is good for me as I like to exercise and the one downside I have to a large young family is no time to work out. But after the storm on December 12th it was not safe to walk. So many downed limbs and lines, some active. It took weeks for the clean up to really be done. And we had a snow storm in there as well so some lines got buried and that was a bit scary for those walking.
So tonight was the first time in weeks that I have felt safe in sashaying out into the night with the dog. And it was beautiful. I like to walk fast and always come back feeling cleansed, like I have left the stress of the day behind me. It isn't the adrenaline rush I get from a work out, or from sessions at the dojo, but it is good. I don't think the pooch gets any rush from walking though. For a field dog, he is the most laid back (another word might be boring) fellow I have ever met!
So tonight was the first time in weeks that I have felt safe in sashaying out into the night with the dog. And it was beautiful. I like to walk fast and always come back feeling cleansed, like I have left the stress of the day behind me. It isn't the adrenaline rush I get from a work out, or from sessions at the dojo, but it is good. I don't think the pooch gets any rush from walking though. For a field dog, he is the most laid back (another word might be boring) fellow I have ever met!
Monday, January 5, 2009
Fingerless Gloves
OK this may not be of interest to anyone who doesn't have chronically cold hands, but I have received the coolest of cool things--well actually that should be the warmest of warm things! Kirsty knit me a set of fingerless gloves while she was at work on Saturday. They really help a lot with my hands being so cold. They stiffen over the course of the day. I can tell that these help my hands because even when my hands feel a little cold now, they have some color to them. Usually they have this really pale marble looking effect. It is a result of my reynauds. I always worry about touching the kids in the cold weather because my hands are usually so dang cold. I tend to run hot water over them before changing a diaper or rubbing lotion on a child. And I run the risk of burning myself when I do that, because I can't feel the warmth.
So the long and short of it is, these glovies help so much and I am so incredibly thankful for them. I look a bit like someone from the cast of Les Mis but that is okay with me!
So the long and short of it is, these glovies help so much and I am so incredibly thankful for them. I look a bit like someone from the cast of Les Mis but that is okay with me!
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Return to the real world!
Ah ,the end of vacation looms on my horizon. Tomorrow I will rise at my usual 5:45 a.m. (I've been sleeping till nearly 7 a.m.!) and the work week will begin. I am lucky. I work only 3 miles from home (though pathetically enough it can sometimes take 12 minutes of drive time) so my mornings are more leisurely than folks who deal with much longer commutes. My wife and I have 15 minutes of time just for us with tea and toast. Then I email my mom who if she doesn't hear from me twice a day thinks a giant sinkhole has formed underneath our home and sucked us down into who knows where. Seriously, she gets weird about it. Kirsty used to think I was exaggerating when I said I had to email her twice a day at her prescribed times or she wigged out. I skippped one morning just to prove my point. She called the house while I was at work to see what was wrong! Kirsty hasn't complained since! (laughing)
Then the kids will get up and it will be breakfasts and Rob's homeschooling. I do two classes with him and then I leave for work. Sort of simultaneously while I am teaching, I am doing breakfast dishes and making my lunch and Chet's. If one doesn't make lunch for Chet he doesn't eat. Then he passes out from low blood sugar. It is all part of the autism and not being able to hear his body signals.
I have had such a truly wonderful vacation. I have been off of work since 1 p.m. on December 24th. That is a long stretch and also only uses 3 actual vacation days because of the way our company did the holidays this year. More typically I take a lot of 3 days weekends which allow us a lot of fun a family but which don't really allow the decompression time that this longer spell away from the office has given me. The last time I was away this long was 2 years ago when we went to Chicago to bring home Elisabeth. While that was exciting and wonderful, restful wouldn't be part of that description!
I know January is going to be stressful at work. We are having an inspection the 21st of January that usually happens in March. There are files to get ready and many many reports to create for this. One would think I would be ready for the task having had so much down time.
And I suppose I am. I know I will be when I walk through the door tomorrow. But right now I don't feel ready to be done with vacation. With so much time with the kids. Crafts and games and walks and time to just be. It has been a blessing.
We have also been lucky in that the factory that we do piece work for has closed early both these weeks due to the holidays as well. So I have been having evenings with no work as well. That very rarely happens. Once the kids are in bed I am usually packing product for the factory. The advantage to that job is that Kirsty and I can be together. One or both of us are available to the kids all the time--I typically have many breaks for story times, bath times etc. That wouldn't be an option if I had a regular part time job. But it has been nice to pretend for a few days that I didn't have to do that. Obviously it wouldn't be cool if this hiatus of the second job lasted long. But to have the gift of time to scrapbook for all the kid's books. To read an adult book for pleasure. (House Rules by Mike Lawson) To curl up on the couch and watch the football game with the boys in HD. Yup, we have an HD TV in our living room and I almost never watch anything on it. If I see tv it is in the work room when we are packing combs. Football in HD is really cool! It has all just been so neat. I didn't go anywhere, except up to Maine for a day to bring gifts to my mom, but I feel like I've had more fun than almost any vacation I could envision. The only other contenders involve scaling a few 5000 foot mountains but I need Lissa to be a bit bigger before we get back to that!
Then the kids will get up and it will be breakfasts and Rob's homeschooling. I do two classes with him and then I leave for work. Sort of simultaneously while I am teaching, I am doing breakfast dishes and making my lunch and Chet's. If one doesn't make lunch for Chet he doesn't eat. Then he passes out from low blood sugar. It is all part of the autism and not being able to hear his body signals.
I have had such a truly wonderful vacation. I have been off of work since 1 p.m. on December 24th. That is a long stretch and also only uses 3 actual vacation days because of the way our company did the holidays this year. More typically I take a lot of 3 days weekends which allow us a lot of fun a family but which don't really allow the decompression time that this longer spell away from the office has given me. The last time I was away this long was 2 years ago when we went to Chicago to bring home Elisabeth. While that was exciting and wonderful, restful wouldn't be part of that description!
I know January is going to be stressful at work. We are having an inspection the 21st of January that usually happens in March. There are files to get ready and many many reports to create for this. One would think I would be ready for the task having had so much down time.
And I suppose I am. I know I will be when I walk through the door tomorrow. But right now I don't feel ready to be done with vacation. With so much time with the kids. Crafts and games and walks and time to just be. It has been a blessing.
We have also been lucky in that the factory that we do piece work for has closed early both these weeks due to the holidays as well. So I have been having evenings with no work as well. That very rarely happens. Once the kids are in bed I am usually packing product for the factory. The advantage to that job is that Kirsty and I can be together. One or both of us are available to the kids all the time--I typically have many breaks for story times, bath times etc. That wouldn't be an option if I had a regular part time job. But it has been nice to pretend for a few days that I didn't have to do that. Obviously it wouldn't be cool if this hiatus of the second job lasted long. But to have the gift of time to scrapbook for all the kid's books. To read an adult book for pleasure. (House Rules by Mike Lawson) To curl up on the couch and watch the football game with the boys in HD. Yup, we have an HD TV in our living room and I almost never watch anything on it. If I see tv it is in the work room when we are packing combs. Football in HD is really cool! It has all just been so neat. I didn't go anywhere, except up to Maine for a day to bring gifts to my mom, but I feel like I've had more fun than almost any vacation I could envision. The only other contenders involve scaling a few 5000 foot mountains but I need Lissa to be a bit bigger before we get back to that!
Saturday, January 3, 2009
Adding a picture of me
When I started this blog I didn't choose an avatar. I am not one for those comic strip looks. I personally loathe comics, though I have children that adore them. Anyway, for unknown reasons I find them so banal that I figured a shadow in the box that was "me" was better than a goofy comic. Because I didn't have a "good" picture of me.
My mom inculcated in me at a very early age that I was the "smart" one and my sister was the "pretty" one. All my growing up years she had my sisters pictures prominently displayed. My senior year photo she chose the one long range shot from the proofs. "at least you are farther back in this one dear, " was her comment. So I grew up rather secure in my ability to think my way out of a paper bag, rather unsure about things like make up (should I bother if I was really ugly?) and whether or not I wanted to try to be more attractive or alluring than I was. Most young girls could talk to their mom about such questions. I couldn't.
As a young adult I learned that though I might be smart, I was also relatively attractive. Dogs didn't bark when I walked down the street and people of both sexes seemed comfortable in my presence. In many respects, I think I was much luckier in the labelling than my sister, who still struggles with the "pretty but dumb" label that my mom saddled her with.
The one scar it did leave me with is an absolute loathing of having my picture taken. And predictably, because it is something I don't feel comfortable doing, the vast majority of the pictures of me really aren't very good. Some catch me in mid word or mid bite, leaving my face distorted. (My eldest son kindly mentioned once that it looked like I had suffered a stroke!) The best pictures are usually ones where I am doing something and not thinking about the camera being present. Pictures of me hiking or at the beach are usually pretty decent. Yet this past week, the picture I added was taken and it is really a decent shot. Again, I didn't notice when it was being taken which is probably why. But the amazing part of it is that it was taken by KC. Yup, my 4 year old. He started messing with our digital camera at Robbie's baseball games this summer and really developed some skills. I made the mistake of getting him a kids camera for Christmas. He liked it for about 10 minutes. Then he said sissy could have this and could he use ours!
My mom inculcated in me at a very early age that I was the "smart" one and my sister was the "pretty" one. All my growing up years she had my sisters pictures prominently displayed. My senior year photo she chose the one long range shot from the proofs. "at least you are farther back in this one dear, " was her comment. So I grew up rather secure in my ability to think my way out of a paper bag, rather unsure about things like make up (should I bother if I was really ugly?) and whether or not I wanted to try to be more attractive or alluring than I was. Most young girls could talk to their mom about such questions. I couldn't.
As a young adult I learned that though I might be smart, I was also relatively attractive. Dogs didn't bark when I walked down the street and people of both sexes seemed comfortable in my presence. In many respects, I think I was much luckier in the labelling than my sister, who still struggles with the "pretty but dumb" label that my mom saddled her with.
The one scar it did leave me with is an absolute loathing of having my picture taken. And predictably, because it is something I don't feel comfortable doing, the vast majority of the pictures of me really aren't very good. Some catch me in mid word or mid bite, leaving my face distorted. (My eldest son kindly mentioned once that it looked like I had suffered a stroke!) The best pictures are usually ones where I am doing something and not thinking about the camera being present. Pictures of me hiking or at the beach are usually pretty decent. Yet this past week, the picture I added was taken and it is really a decent shot. Again, I didn't notice when it was being taken which is probably why. But the amazing part of it is that it was taken by KC. Yup, my 4 year old. He started messing with our digital camera at Robbie's baseball games this summer and really developed some skills. I made the mistake of getting him a kids camera for Christmas. He liked it for about 10 minutes. Then he said sissy could have this and could he use ours!
Friday, January 2, 2009
On the kindness of iinsurance adjusters
The ice storm of December 12th damaged our beautiful birch irreparabley. The three crowns of branches at the top were all broken and while they have not yet fallen it is clear that the tree needs to be removed. It occured to me that this must be why people have homeowners insurance and that we should call our adjuster. Which we did and promptly received a call back. Did we have fallen limbs, he asked. Well yes, I said but we had all ready long since cleared that type of debris. Hmmmm. I hear murmers at the other end of the phone line. The problem, he explained to me, is that tree trimming and removal is considered normal maintenance, even though the birch in questions was healthy and only required attention due to the damage sustained in the storm.
Ah, I say. Not being particularly assertive in such matters, I continued on to the effect that well, it didn't hurt us to inquire and we just thought since we had not had a claim in 25 years that perhaps help might have been forthcoming.
Now it is the adjusters turn to say "ah.". He reminds me that i have a $500 deductable on the policy. I said that I knew this but that I had hoped I would get a couple hundred dollars as last time I took down a tree is was about $700.00 A moments silence on the line. Did we lose power during the storm, wonders the adjuster.
Oh yes, I said, for 30 hours. In a happier tone he asks if perhaps we lost any food due to the power failure. Well no, I explained as our house was so cold that our milk and soy milk stayed fine on the counter. And since we are vegetarians there were no meats to worry about. No hard feelings, I continued, I just thought we would see what was available.
You know, the adjuster went on, I really want to help you. How about if I issue a check for $200 and call it funds for downed limbs even though you all ready took care of that? This conversationi was the day before yesterday; the check arrived today.
It isn't a lot of money, but it is really cool that they paid anything at all when it is clear that they didn't have to. And it will help with the dismantling (sob) of our beloved birch tree.
Ah, I say. Not being particularly assertive in such matters, I continued on to the effect that well, it didn't hurt us to inquire and we just thought since we had not had a claim in 25 years that perhaps help might have been forthcoming.
Now it is the adjusters turn to say "ah.". He reminds me that i have a $500 deductable on the policy. I said that I knew this but that I had hoped I would get a couple hundred dollars as last time I took down a tree is was about $700.00 A moments silence on the line. Did we lose power during the storm, wonders the adjuster.
Oh yes, I said, for 30 hours. In a happier tone he asks if perhaps we lost any food due to the power failure. Well no, I explained as our house was so cold that our milk and soy milk stayed fine on the counter. And since we are vegetarians there were no meats to worry about. No hard feelings, I continued, I just thought we would see what was available.
You know, the adjuster went on, I really want to help you. How about if I issue a check for $200 and call it funds for downed limbs even though you all ready took care of that? This conversationi was the day before yesterday; the check arrived today.
It isn't a lot of money, but it is really cool that they paid anything at all when it is clear that they didn't have to. And it will help with the dismantling (sob) of our beloved birch tree.
Thursday, January 1, 2009
Happy New Year!
Happy New Year everyone! I wish for all of us the wisdom to savor life, to engage in our experiences richly, strength to meet the inevitable challenges, and friendships to share the journey.
It was a lovely low key New Years Day here. The kids slept till nearly 7 a.m. You have no idea how LATE that is in our house! LOL After a hearty breakfast, I played with them for a while. I am relishing my time off and the increased family time. I updated my subjects in Robbie's plan book so that when we resume homeschooling after the holidays my end of things is up to date. After lunch, buoyed by my bookkeeping success in the homeschooling arena I ventured into the lair where I do the financial bookkeeping. This is a cold little alleyway off the kitchen (old houses are often oddly configured. In our house this is especially true since it was built before indoor plumbing and electricity) Anyway in this freezing little nook is my ancient imac and the detritis of a years worth of bill paying. I shredded all the things that needed shredding, filed all the things that needed filing and set up the new files for 2009. To say I feel virtuous is the greatest understatement in the world!
Celebrated all that responsible adult behavior with helping the kids make scratch art snowflakes to hang from our dining room chandelier. Rob and KC are really good at these (they were actually left over from decorations we did for solstice last year) and this year Lissa could bring the finished ones to me so that I could hang them. They look amazing, and dangle nicely adding a bit of festivity now that all the Yule decorations are put away.
For supper, KC Lissa and Rob wanted to make pizza so the kiddos had that while K and I had more lentil soup. (though we jazzed it up. Last night we made it from the classic italian recipe we found on line. It was um, bland springs readily to mind! ) I almost don't know what to do with my free time. We don't have any piece work right now. Usually I have 4 hours of that to do at night. KC has fallen asleep the past couple nights at a normal time and i have had time to actually read a book that had chapters. An adult book! LOL I hesitate to get too excited. Last time that happened I got within 40 pages of the end and his sleep cycle changed and my reading window disappeared. I tried to renew the book at the library and someone else had it on reserve so i had to return it with the last 40 pages unread.
So now, shall I dare to hope that I can read again tonight???? Hmmmm, we will see what the first night of the new year holds!
It was a lovely low key New Years Day here. The kids slept till nearly 7 a.m. You have no idea how LATE that is in our house! LOL After a hearty breakfast, I played with them for a while. I am relishing my time off and the increased family time. I updated my subjects in Robbie's plan book so that when we resume homeschooling after the holidays my end of things is up to date. After lunch, buoyed by my bookkeeping success in the homeschooling arena I ventured into the lair where I do the financial bookkeeping. This is a cold little alleyway off the kitchen (old houses are often oddly configured. In our house this is especially true since it was built before indoor plumbing and electricity) Anyway in this freezing little nook is my ancient imac and the detritis of a years worth of bill paying. I shredded all the things that needed shredding, filed all the things that needed filing and set up the new files for 2009. To say I feel virtuous is the greatest understatement in the world!
Celebrated all that responsible adult behavior with helping the kids make scratch art snowflakes to hang from our dining room chandelier. Rob and KC are really good at these (they were actually left over from decorations we did for solstice last year) and this year Lissa could bring the finished ones to me so that I could hang them. They look amazing, and dangle nicely adding a bit of festivity now that all the Yule decorations are put away.
For supper, KC Lissa and Rob wanted to make pizza so the kiddos had that while K and I had more lentil soup. (though we jazzed it up. Last night we made it from the classic italian recipe we found on line. It was um, bland springs readily to mind! ) I almost don't know what to do with my free time. We don't have any piece work right now. Usually I have 4 hours of that to do at night. KC has fallen asleep the past couple nights at a normal time and i have had time to actually read a book that had chapters. An adult book! LOL I hesitate to get too excited. Last time that happened I got within 40 pages of the end and his sleep cycle changed and my reading window disappeared. I tried to renew the book at the library and someone else had it on reserve so i had to return it with the last 40 pages unread.
So now, shall I dare to hope that I can read again tonight???? Hmmmm, we will see what the first night of the new year holds!
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