Multiple Intelligences

First off, a big thank you to Gas Station Cap. who suggested I investigate 'multiple intelligences." I am happy to report that I have and found the concept fascinating.  I had previously decided that Lissa was most likely a kinesthetic learner (as is my eldest, Chet) and have approached our learning situations together with that in mind.  But I had never heard of the concept of multiple intelligences and it fascinates me.  It also very much speaks to my core belief that everyone has a niche, a gift, and "blooms" in their own time and space when properly nurtured.

Last night at the park, Lissa was "playing circus".  We have a narrow plastic border to the play area that we walk on and pretend we are tightrope walkers.  If we slip off we either fall into the lion pit or the safety nets; she tends to change up the result of error! LOL  At any rate, this border is actually a bit narrower than a balance beam and she can walk it for a long time without slipping off.  Last night she decided to add an occasional skip as she went along and STILL did not fall off. (she also has never done this type of thing in her gymnastics class so it was something she thought of on her own.)

  I am in awe of that balance ability at such a young age.  It has its downsides too, from a parenting perspective.  I feel like I am always watching to make sure she doesn't leap gleefully off something too high (say, a cliff!) because she obviously can't gauge such things and like myself, she appears to be a bit of an adrenaline junkie!

A,B, C

Lissa is finally starting to learn her letters!  I have been stressing over this.  As a homeschooling mom I know that usually everything is fine.  Kids learn at different paces.  KC was on the early end of the curve as he recognized the alphabet before he was 3 and was teaching himself to write letters at 3.  However, Lissa is 3 1/2 and didn't recognize any letter.  I read to all the kids nightly, I play games that involve letters, shapes numbers you name it.  The alphabet is a prominent home made "border" in our living room.  Kind of a  chair rail height so it is at eye level for young kids.  But Lissa is more about trucks and movement.  She even holds books upside down fairly frequently so I could tell that letters had no real defined shape for her.

There are things that Lissa does earlier than KC did too.  Movement areas where she excels with strength and balance, for instance.

But knowing what I know of her pre-natal  history, I worry.  So I have been on a mission the past few months.  Every single book we read from the library has been an alphabet oriented book.  Chika chicka boom boom, Usborne Alphabet Book, Alphabet at the Museum, you get the drift. LOL

It is working!  She now recognizes A, B, and sometimes C. M, N, O, and P  It is a start.  It is progress.  I am slightly less stressed!

Starting the day like Lady G*Ga!

OK, so I am known for walking really really fast.  I am a speedy person on most days.  This morning I was speedier than usual as I had to drop a script off for Rob's eyedrops (trying to get his meds set for camp which is coming up soon).  I had to drop stuff at goodwill on my way to work. And yup, had to get to work.  I was wearing a fave sundress that K made me many years ago.  Faithful blog readers are probably all ready aware of the fact that I wear my clothes till they fall apart.  However, this does not usually take place ON me!

I slid into the van seat to scoot over to the pharmacy.  I got there, scooted out real quick and started hurrying down the aisle to drop off area.  Suddenly I realize I am feeling a breeze.  A breeze where I should not feel a breeze.  Oh, did I mention this sundress has a full length zipper?  Said zipper had done something weird.  It was zipped at the top.  Everywhere else?  Um.  Not really.  Wonder what the sales people thought about the strange woman holding the back of her dress together and walking crablike out of the store?  K said it was an old fashioned coil zipper (whatever that is) that she got on sale a long time ago.  It's time has come. It. is. retired. Forever.

Fathers Day, Oomas Day and chillin in the 'pool'

I decided not to go to church today.  It is closing Sunday for our UU congregation. Though there are services through the summer they are all lay led and we will not come together again with the full complement of staff (or parishioners) till after Labor Day.  I usually go, but I took the cowards way out.  I saw that the sermon topic was all about fathering.  Totally appropriate since today is Fathers Day.  But since my father and I have a really non-existant relationship, it is somewhat painful to sit there and listen to the poems and odes to good fathers. 

On a happier note I was surprised to find out that today was Ooma's day at our house. Remember that Ooma's Day is sort of a "floating holiday" at our house.  It happens whenever the rest of the family decide that there is sufficient time to properly fete the Ooma!  LOL  Rob leaves for camp next week and I think this also factored into choosing today to honor me as that means that the next 2 weekends we would be pretty busy dropping him off, picking him up and wading through a weeks worth of teen boy laundry.

 K has finished working Saturdays and since I had said I wasn't going to church, she knew the morning would be slower paced and she and the kids surprised me.  They had rehearsed a song, KC made me a story book, Rob gave me coupons for house work, Chet gave me a book light, Lissa made me a card, and my wife made the coolest t shirt with pictures of the kids all over it. I got muffins and tea in bed to nosh on while I admired my gifts--it was divine.

I have also taken Chet shopping at one of his favorite stores.  He shops fairly infrequently as there is not much he needs or wants and he is prone to hoarding flotsam and jetsam which leaves little room for actual belongings.  But he has tried hard and needed to have this so I took him.  Afterwards he gave me a big hug and thanked me in a totally appropriate and spontaneous manner.

KC and I went to a fabric store while Chet shopped.  I had to get supplies for a project I am making for KC's group in church school.  KC had been to the new store recently with K and couldn't wait to show me the "very bestest part of the whole store."  Now keeping in mind that the store holds untold bolts of fabric, umpteen thousand crafting things, and home decorating options, I was floored to find out what the "bestest" part was. . .   BUTTONS!  Novelty buttons galore and the absolute joy of his day!

Came home and it was sprinkling but really hot.  We filled the wading pool and the kids jumped in and out of the pool and shot around the water shooters for a good hour before lunch.  Doesn't get much better than that!

Family and Fiona

I have been mulling this post for a while and it still doesn't come together all that cohesively.  Or maybe it does and I just don't like facing the reality of it. For whatever reason, I keep writing it and hitting the delete button. Talk about stuck in a loop.  So today I have vowed to hit publish and just get this over with.  It is what it is, as my wife is so fond of saying.

Fiona was removed from our house 9 years ago.  She only lived with us a very brief time.  Although she caused total destruction of her room and some other belongings I have to say I was never afraid of her.  But the kids were.  Rob's reaction was severe and profound.  So was Chet's but it was different and complicated by his Aspergers.

Obviously, my intent has been to be a consistant, loving presence in Fiona's life in whatever capacity she felt comfortable with.  Over the years, she has decided it is okay to view me as a parent. She introduces me that way now.  And I love it.  I waited a long time to hear that.

I have been increasingly joyful about Fiona over the past six or so months.  The contact has been easier, thanks to the wonderful and amazing  Jane.  She has made strides in areas that I didn't think possible for her in many behaviors.  There are still miles to go.  There may be miles she can't walk.  But I figure my job as a parent is to be there. To help with the walk when and how I can.  To cheer her on. To love her.

Hearing she could come here again for a visit made me over the moon happy.  It is not as if she never came back here after her removal. She celebrated at least two Christmas afternoons here with us and had a couple other visits too, or times we stopped in after bowling, or a movie etc. But when my mom heard about the visit, all she had was fear.  Fear that I would need restraints that i didn't know how to use. Fear that the other kids and I would not be safe.  Fear . . . well the list was fairly legion.

And I realize that she speaks from a place of love for me and for my children who live here with me all the time.  And she has never met Fiona and seen her sweet sides, even though I have shared them via email or phone conversation.  The problem is that I also shared my concerns for and about Fiona over the years.  When treatments were not going well, when hospitalizations occured, etc.  I thought it was safe and appropriate to vent to my mom.

But doing so poisoned the well so to speak. And I didn't know that by sharing in this way with someone I trusted that I would do that. And that saddens me so much.

Last Solitary Saturday . . .

till September!  K switches to a Friday shift for the summer and though her paycheck will be a lot less I am looking forward to the increased time for us all together as a family. Next Saturday we take Rob up to a UU campground in my mom's state for a week of away camp.  I know he enjoys this greatly and I know too that he usually returns with a slightly increased appreciation for his family.

Today he got to spend his birthday money on the skateboarder sneaks he has been hoping for.  It takes him forever to choose so I actually went to the store next door and bought some sundries for the house, went back to the sports store and bought myself a bathing suit and he was just then finishing up.  (laughing)  I tried on 2 suits and liked them both so I let the kids choose which one to buy.  KC and Lissa predictably each chose the one the other did not, so Rob was the tie breaker vote.  It is  a two piece tankini kind of tie dyed looking. It is really pretty. Best of all, it cost $15.00  Pretty cool.

Now I am off to look for a lemonade recipe.  I used to use one from someone's blog but they don't have that blog any longer and I didn't print off her oh so divine lemonade recipe.  Off to google as there are lemons on the counter awaiting to be squeezed!

Will Fiona visit us?

Last night Fiona called. She asked me if I would "let" her visit us at home.  I have never ever said she couldn't so of course the answer is yes.  The weird part of the question was that after we were on our way home from the last visit, KC asked when Fiona would come and visit us at our house.  Truly those two have some kind of psychic connection thing going on.

There is stuff to work through before it happens and I suspect it is longer down the road than either kid thinks.   The plan is for 3 successful on site visits (we have had 2 thus far) and three successful off site visits in their area. These would be walks or jaunts to a park etc.  Fiona suggested a trip to a toy store and both Jane and I said no to that particular plan! LOL

Then after those had happened we would work on a visit to our house.  From my perspective the main logistical nightmare is transport and making sure that Fiona is willing to follow her diabetic eating plan at our home. there was a bit of a dustup when she made her food choice at our last visit.  Her choice was a giant plate of stuffing.  Clearly more than one starch worth.  Jane had to deal with it as it was on their turf and i just busied myself with everyone else's lunch options.  But if she is with us she needs to be amenable to eating in a way that is going to keep her safe and healthy during the visit.   It is exciting to be working toward this though.  It kindles--or rekindles that hope in me that someday she could spend  a weekend, be here on holidays etc.  And i know of course rationally that those are trigger times and not on the time line at all at this point, but I can't help myself!