Dreaming of those lazy hazy days of summer

OK this morning I have gotten the shopping done, banked at 2 banks, took care of the kids donation to the animal shelter, shopped for the food pantry, taken sleeping bag gear to the laundromat and retrieved same, done dance class and the library.  Fed the troops lunch and shooed them outdoors.  I find myself dreaming of quieter days.  I was thinking about summer which is somewhat lazier for me.  There is no dance class so our mornings start a little later.  There is not church on Sundays as regularly till fall. There is no youth group or youth choir.

To be sure there are other things, but I really look forward to them.  Gardening. Beaching. Camping. The kids and I have all ready booked our first campout in NH with friends.  It will be sooo much fun.  KC has been planning to hold a luau for his friends and we have scheduled that for the last Saturday in July.  It isn't anything elaborate.  Essentially a cookout with Hawaiin decorations and a slip and slide, a tie dye craft, and a limbo game.  We are hosting K's family's annual BBQ this year in August. That is more work but I love to entertain so that is fun.  There are so many simple things that I love in the summer.  Berry picking. Canning.  Fresh salsa. Veggies straight from the garden or the farmers market.Hiking.  Painting Lissa and my toenails. OK so maybe none of that qualifies as lazy hazy but it sure sounds like fun!

Fiona's a Star!

 My daughter, hamming for the camera when we got to the Great School in the City!  She looks so shy doesn't she?  LOL  And the ring I brought her went perfectly with this outfit, which I thank the goddess for.  I had no clue what she was wearing!

 Looking pensive here and I love this shot.

And Rob, looking as relaxed as he was all night. And this was about the first 15 minutes or so.  I think he was very nervous about seeing his cousins again. It has been a long time.  Many many years.  I tried to initiate conversation about that before we went  and he made it pretty clear that he was "fine."  So I let it ride and will see if we have better luck with talking AFTER the visit. Cause he sure wasn't fine.  His posture was more tense and guarded than I have seen in years.  And his cousins were super nice and have really changed and become so much more kind and accepting.

Fiona rocked out her Lauryn Hill song and KC pronounced to one and all that his sister was the best!  I kept trying to temper that remark as truly every student did amazingly and you could see what a huge leap they were making getting up to sing.  Not an easy thing even  for the "normal" to contemplate.  So much harder with issues of trauma, brain injury, Tourettes, paralysis depression and more.  The issues these students face are all hard.  Listening to a parapalegic sing the song "Flying without Wings" about brought me to tears.  But many of the performers including my daughter did that to me several times.  She is a fighter.  She is sensitive. She is talented. She is fragile. She is my daughter.  I love her.  And tonight, she openly embraced me, called me her mom, introduced me to friends as such, even while introducing her cousins. There was no line.  We were family, encircling her with love and it was the best feeling in the world.

Great Phone Call

Fiona called tonight and she sounded great!  Happy, vivacious, no slow halting words.  No slurring.  Yes, a bit more animated than might be deemed "normal."  But truly the need to medicate children so that they are at an "acceptable" level for showing happiness and/or enthusiasm has always bothered me.  Right now Fiona has a lot to be happy about.  The arts and entertainment night is in 2 days. She knows that we are all going to be there to watch her sing, and have supper with her, as is her cousin and her cousin's daughter. (2nd cousin?? I don't understand extended relationships like that all that well!)  What kid wouldn't be pretty excited with that happening?

Jane asked me if I had ever heard Fiona sound this way and the answer was not in years.  Years.  I think that the need to try and find a med combo that kept her safe from self harm had led for a long time to regimens that basically nearly flattened all her emotions. Sure she didn't get as angry. She didn't get much of anything.  She was happy to see us, yes. But part of what Fi has to learn is that it is okay to feel things and to learn how to cope with those feelings in safe and appropriate ways.  Not to feel nothing as an alternative.  I am so looking forward to Thursday night. I have taken part of a personal day to make sure we can get to the Great City with no rushing and stress.

In other random news---my boss today came out after his review by our new company. He looked at me with a stunned expression on his face.  "can you believe that they want me to work every minute of the day?" he whined to me.  I swear I thought it was one of my kids talking to me.  It would have been funny if it wasn't kind of pathetic.

Rob's Home!

The New York trip was an unqualified success!  Rob and K arrived home last night a little before 11 p.m.  Tired but happy.  The littles had made a welcome home poster that was hanging on the front door waiting for them.  I was still up to welcome them home as I can't sleep when some of my family are due in. 

They did soooo much stuff in the city. They visited Battery Park and took great pics of the Statue of Liberty. They were in the Financial District, in Soho, ate in Chinatown, walked through Central Park, visited Ground Zero. Rob was part of a contingent that visited MoMA and I can tell from his pictures that he loved it there. Saw the Addams Family on Broadway.  And they shopped.  Rob came home with new duds that he purchased.  Though one pair of pants don't look like he can breathe when he wears them, I am saying nothing. LOL 

Oddly enough he remembered to buy a gift for me but forgot to get anything for the kids. I know he didn't forget me because I got this really great Bob Marley shirt.  My love of reggae is legendary and it isn't a love Rob really shares (laughing) It is a really cool T shirt and it is the right size (a huge bonus since I couldn't exactly exchange it!)  But somehome the littles and Chet fell off his radar. 

I will confess that there is a long standing family rule that when one goes away one returns with a "remembrance" for the sibs left behind.  It can be small (frankly a postcard is sufficient).  It is all about showing that we remember each other even when we are apart.  I think for Rob, despite having a bunch of years where he has had good experiences, there is still a componet that harkens back to the times when there wasn't enough.  Enough love. Enough money. Enough care. Just enough.  So when he gets to do something the first time, it becomes All About Rob.  And I think there is part of him that doesn't fully wrap his mind about how important he is in all our lives, and most especially in the lives of KC and Lissa who are sure he is one step down from god.

I decided that I would just act like I was sure he had remembered his siblings even though K has told me privately that he hadn't.  He decided on his own that he had of course remembered them, and a belt appeared for Chet, a very large blingy watch showed up for KC and Lissa now sports the hat Rob is wearing in the picture above.  In no way did this strip him of too many articles he purchased during his trip.  He still has several new hats, 2 new pairs of pants, a new backpack etc.  I ignored the fact that the watch is too big for KC as is Lissa's hat.  I exclaimed over them, as did the littles who were predictably just thrilled to be remembered.  As this happened, I saw Rob glow too, and I hope that there will next time be that memory of the joy of sharing a bit of reflected happiness in this way.

Sunday Reflections

It is Sunday night and sometime very late tonight my wife and my son will return from New York. They have been having a great time with the youth group.  K called me twice and today recounted their visit to MOMA, Battery Park, Central Park and informed me that there had been much shopping by the teens.  All the girls had bought new outfits to wear to the Broadway show they saw this afternoon, and Rob?  Rob found the long wished for red skinny jeans.  Also a pair of black skinny jeans and a graphic T shirt.

Back the ranch, we have had a nice weekend.  My mom was here for a visit and the kids really enjoyed having a longer stretch of "nana" time.  That has not happened much as in recent  years her husbands health precluded being away from him that long.  Then she became worried to leave her cat (!)  But she arrived mid day Saturday and did not leave till actually after we left for church.  There were games played and chatter and art and lots of catching up. We went for a walk after supper together, the littles racing ahead while my mom and I talked.

Today at church we had a Go Green and Leap into Spring party.  It was co-hosted by the "Green" Committee at church and the Religious Ed committee.  It was a lot of fun.  The littles and i were in charge of setting materials and samples of paper flowers on the tables.  As we visited at the tables we made flowers which would be delivered by Parish Services to shut ins.  We divide by birthdays at this particular event.  Last year we sat at the December table for Lissa. This year we sat at April for KC.  Neither of the kids want to sit at a table without me so I pretend that whatever month I am at is my "honorary" birthday.  But conversation flowed freely and it was so great to see the kids chat with adults and meet new people comfortably.

I buckled down this weekend and got our taxes done.  I hate this.  Most people do, but people in a same sex marriage I am sure hate it most of all.  I have to do a federal as head of household for Kirsty. A federal as head of household for me and then a NEW federal that is not submitted that combines both our incomes so that I can file a joint tax return for our state that lists us as married. Because part of my wife's income is from a home based business the whole ordeal takes just short of forever.  And most of this I of course do late at night when the wee ones are asleep.  But it is done and the two that can be efiled have been sent.  Mine has the adoption credit so I have to snail mail that federal and will probably see the refund in oh--5 or6 months judging from the gossip I hear from other filers!  LOL

In between I have baked, and cleaned, and helped the kids make a welcome home banner for Robbie. Oh and we visited our neighbor friend for an hour or so of play time.  But it hasn't felt rushed.  It has been a lovely weekend.  I need to hold tight to some of this happy mojo as I head into the hectic crazy work week that awaits!

April Fools!

I like being silly with the kids. So last night when the littles had gone to bed, we ordered Dominos Pizza which I stored and re-heated gently in the oven this a.m. The delivery guy thought this was so funny. (I felt somewhat compelled to explain that I was NOT eating 3 medium pizzas myself at 9:30 at night!) Woke them all to supper. . . April Fools!  They got a huge kick out of having pizza for breakfast and cereal for supper. 

They hid fake snakes in the laundry basket for Kirsty (I alerted her to make sure she would squeal appreciatively)

And Mother Nature got in on the act dumping some snow on us!

Fire Hydrants

Yesterday we were taking a walk after supper.  Lissa is very tactile, touching everything. and then, despite her being 4, or perhaps because of it, her hands go to her mouth.  As we passed a fire hydrant by the side of the street she reached out to touch it. 

"Lissa honey, please don't touch the fire hydrant," I said, knowing that her hands would next be in her mouth.

"Why Ooma?"
"Well, dogs pee on fire hydrants for one thing."
(pause)
"Oh is that why they are yellow?"

ROFL