Thursday, March 18, 2010

Of Beads and park swings

The on-set of warmer weather and day light savings time has meant that we have been outside after supper.  We love this. We have gone for walks and are spending a lot of time up at the local park.  Last night the park had lots of kids; everyone was feeling stir crazy and the weather was gorgeous.  There were probably 5 other black children there which was neat.  One mom I know vaguely from a couple times that we connected last summer. She is really nice and we enjoy chatting.  Her son is around Lissa's age and has this munga head of hair.  It was just pulled back in this very messy queue last night and the mom noticed Lissa's braids and beads.  She asked where I get them done and I said we do them ourselves.  She shared that she wants to cornrow her son's hair but doesn't know how.  I don't really cornrow yet so I couldn't offer to help but I did tell her about the internet tools I have used to help me along the hair care journey. 

It was funny though as my first thought was shock when she said she didn't know how to braid.  (not even the cheater way that we do Lissa's) And that is such a stereotype.  I have made no bones about the fact that I can't take care of my own hair with any degree of artistry. I can wash it. I can comb it.  I can sometimes make it curl slightly. That's about it folks. I could write a whole other blog entry of the time we almost had to cut hot rollers out of my hair, or how last week trying to color it gave me a major allergic reaction etc.  So why think this woman would just know how to braid?

I think the reason is that so many other black friends and acquaintences that I have spoken with have all said how important  braid skill is.  Now maybe this is just a test for a white adoptive mom. I also have one friend who candidly told me that if I was black it would not be a big deal if I had a messy headed child, but that it would be a big deal because I am not black.  Maybe because I want so badly for my children to be comfortable with their racial identity, I have worried more about this than I ever would if my children shared my ethnic heritage.  Now I just need to learn how to corn row!  (grin)

1 comment:

Todd said...

Sounds like a good park day. It was gorgeous here yesterday as well and today's looking really good. Tomorrow? Possible snow flurries :-(