Security and staying dry

So Miss Lissa has been doing really well with night time potty training.  Hardly any accidents, even when we went camping. (which amazed me)  But our bedtime situation is kind of wonky.  KC was starting out in his bed (which is at the bottom of my bed) and staying there for 1/2 to 3/4 of the night and then moving in to my bed.  Lissa was starting in her bed (next room over) and coming into my  bed at some point as well.  Which was all well and good--except that Lissa wakens earlier than KC. And when she is lying next to him, she pokes him awake.  By midweek he is definately showing the signs of not getting enough rest.

So I thought in my infinite parental wisdom that since he was staying in his bed most of the night, I should encourage Lissa to do the same in her bed.  She doesn't cuddle with me in bed.  Doesn't cuddle with KC.  Doesn't really like anyone to TOUCH her in bed. So I thought it was not a big deal. I thought maybe she was just coming in with me because KC had and that if he wasn't, she would not feel the need the do so. We talked briefly about us all staying in our own beds and I began leaving the gate between our two rooms closed.

And Lissa stayed quietly in her bed each night.  KC got more sleep in his bed.  I had acres of  a king sized bed to myself. After a couple nights, Lissa wet the bed.  Copiously.  Still slept in her bed but was awash when I went in to wake her up.  Clueless parent I thought she had just had a drink fairly close to bed (true) and was maybe extra tired (possible.) 

Except that over the ensuing few weeks, she began wetting the bed almost every night.  I am ashamed to say that it took me a while to make the connection between the fact she was in her bed alone now and maybe felt anxioius about this.  Mid way through last week I started letting her come back into my bed.  She has been dry ever since.

I felt bad for the wee miss.  She is so tall and so self possessed much of the time which perhaps make it easy to overlook the fact that she is still only 3 and needing reassurance in the big big world.  So for now I have not quite figured out a solution that allows KC to sleep longer but am mulling over naps--midday quiet reading times etc, because Lissa will be back in bed!