More on a visit

I got an email from Jane yesterday and she had met with Fiona's mini-team  about a potential visit somewhere down the road.  They are willing to fetch us if we take the train in which is absolutely fantastic news.  I was googling to figure out subway and bus schedules and such but to do this w/ all the kids in tow was obviously going to be stressful.  Jane also had questions for me on a family member who apparently has expressed interest in seeing Fiona.  I identified who the person was.  It was funny though that Fiona's social worker didn't know who the person was.  On the other hand, maybe she is just overworked and I am sure the file is an immense one  after all these years.

A co-worker of mine asked yesterday why I work so hard at keeping these connections.  She pointed out quite rightly that my son doesn't seem all that interested in it.  Truthfully, I don't think he is.  I think at this point in his life, knowing that his other siblings are safe and doing well (by whatever yardstick at 13 y/o uses) is enough for him. His primary focus is our immediate family, his friends and sports.  Ah yes, my Rob is all about sports! LOL   However, there will come a time when he wants and needs more than that.  If I haven't done my part, keeping ties as strong as possible, keeping doors of communication wide open, he is going to feel angry at me, or disloyal to me if he tries to do this on his own, or just plain confused and frustrated.  I don't want that for him. 

That is one part of the equation.  The other is that quite simply I care.  I have known Fiona and Crystal since they were 9. (they are only 9 months apart and were the same age when I met them) I have known Dee for a much shorter time but I care about all these kids. They have had so much hardship and loss.  I can't make up for that.  But I can be in relationship with them.