More addiction ramblings

A while ago I wrote about my fears about addiction and kids.  My fears got ramped up a bit this week as a beloved young family member (not one of my kids, thank the goddess) will be entering a 4 to 6 week treatment facility for addiction today.  It will be the second time this person has faced the demons of addiction in a rehab setting.  This program is longer--4 to 6 weeks and looks "harder" in the work that they expect their patients to do on facing not just the detox but the reasons why they are not staying clean on the outside. 

The immediate family involved have also been damaged and traumatized by this situation.  Much healing is needed for all.  Obviously, in respect of confidentiality and the fact that this is only "my" story in the most perepheral of ways, I am not blogging details. (which probably made these two paragraphs kind of wonky to read)

But what I can say is that I had a talk with my Rob about it today.  He knows the person involved and they are relatively close in age.  I can also trust that Rob will not say something inappropriate about the treatment or the addiction when they see one another again.  It was scary to talk about.  It was scary to watch his reaction because I could tell by what he did not say, and where his eyes slid off of mine, that at a minimum he knows people who use some type of drugs. I presented things factually.  I said that I knew that at the age he was now, that friends would use, friends would talk about drugs, that opportunities would present themselves.  And that it scared me. Because no parent wants to lose their child to a drug overdose.  Or to a beating from a drug dealer.  Or to jail.

This is virgin ground to me. My Chet hates taking a painkiller if he has a headache so drug use was never a worry and still isn't.  He is the guy who would not let them knock him out when his 4 impacted wisdom teeth were removed.  He also wasn't popular.  Opportunities to even consider something like that just probably didn't come his way.

Rob on the other hand, is popular.  He likes to hang out with skateboarders at the park.  He has friends in youth group.  His circle is way wider than Chet's was.  I am vigilent but I also know that when kids want to do something, they can find a way. I may be old, but I remember being a kid.  I remember rules that I thought were stupid and the creative ways I found to circumnavigate them.

 I actually try to let my kids have occasional  small ways to "one up" the parent (like sneaking 10 minutes of a frowned upon TV show) because I figure if they feel they can do that they might not spend so much time finding a really serious way to try and snow me.  But drugs, drugs I watch for like a hawk.