Free Time Angst

I don't do down time real well.  I have worked multiple jobs since I was in high school.   When I was in college I had 3 part time jobs and was a full time student and lived on my own.  I was raised with the simple succint motto:  busy is good.  And my parents meant productive busy. Not goofy busy, if you know what I mean.  Stacking wood was good busy.  Painting the house was good busy. That kind of thing.  For the past 11 or so years I have worked fulltime from 8 to 4 and at night from the kids bedtimes to 10:30ish at night, I have done piece work for our home side job. It used to be folding paper and in more recent years became putting combs in bags for stores.  Some one has to do it and I have been lucky enough to be paid to do it.  It is not high paying unless you are fast and if you do something that long you do get fast.  And it has the huge benefit of being a job I can jump up from if something or someone really needs me here. But since the day before Thanksgiving we have not had piece work.  None.  The first few nights were fun.  It was like a vacation. Especially when I was also off from my day job for the Thanksgiving break.  I caught up scrapbooks. I cleaned. I decorated. I read. I played even more with the kids.  I baked. I blogged. I facebooked more than I ever have in my life.

But it is December 7th and this "vacation" from my side job is getting old.  I do pretty much count on this money in our budget.  It allows my wife to not have to work fulltime outside the home.  And I have found that I clearly must have some bizarre form of ADD myself.  For instance, I can't watch TV when I don't work.  Literally.  I get bored.  Or tired.  Last night I only made till half time with Rob when we watched the Pats game.  He and I  watch a movie together every Friday night.  I LIKE that and I like the time I spend with my son. But I like my hands to be busy. Without the combs to bag, I find my attention wandering, my mind drifting off to other areas.  (admittedly that might be due to the fact that the plot lines get thin on some of those teen movies! LOL) But aside from a few hours of wrapping ahead of me, my holiday prep is done.   So, hey goddess, I am really really ready to do more work.  Are you listening?