About Fiona

Last night was Fiona's call night.  5:30 came and went and the kids asked when she was calling.  We have had her call late--she's been doing things that ran late sometimes and once, Jane had a staff meeting that made for a late call--so I wasn't concerned.  Shortly after that, the phone rang and it was Jane.

She said she forgot to email me that Fiona was hospitalized on Saturday.  It is a psych hospitalization and she will be there to at least this Friday and possibly through the next week.  It just rocked me back.  I know I sounded like an idiot.  And truthfully probably AM an idiot as my daughter has had multiple hospitalizations over the years.  But I am Pollyanna remember? I  live in hope that the healing that has been happening will prevent these sad results.  Will keep her safe and others safe around her.  Jane said we could call the hospital and have a 5 minute call but I was kind of an emotional wreck at that time after the news.  I actually don't think I was making a whole lot of sense when I talked to Jane.  Likely she thinks I need hospitalization at this point.

K was out at a meeting so I was alone with the kids.  Luckily they had gotten weary of waiting for the call and my simply saying their sister wouldn't call held them for a while and they went back to playing with the glow in the dark space shooters.  I needed to process, so I made scones and cleaned the kitchen.  The kids got a kicking breakfast this morning as a result and I was a lot calmer by the time I finished.

The rational part of me knows that it is very likely Fiona will require periodica hospitalizations throughout her life.  I have emailed Jane and asked for the number of the hospital so we can call her tonight.  Mental illness, trauma, substance exposure, man it all sucks.